June Part 3 – Flava Flaaav!

The following week, I got a call to come in as my event monitor was ready. Since the hospital only has a certain amount of the monitors, there was a waiting period, but I lucked out as I didn’t wait for very long. An event monitor records 5 “events”, whether it is dizziness, chest pain, heart flutters, etc. You hit the button, and it will have a small period before you hit the button recorded, as well as a minute or so after. I was told the battery lasted for two weeks, but could return it if I had experienced 5 events within that time frame.

 I was sent to a small room in the cardiology department, and a man showed me how to use the event monitor. There was only two electrodes, one that went on my right, underneath my collarbone, and one that went on my left side, on my rib. It was color coded and pretty much idiot proof. Unfortunately for me, the man was like, “well, it’s easy to hide, you can just attach it to your pants, like a pager…oh wait, yours doesn’t have that piece.” Go figure. So in the meantime, it had to hang from my neck.

 I was pretty unimpressed as the cord was uncomfortable and the monitor was heavy and looked like a  giant old school iPod. I felt a bit like Flava Flav, but not quite as awesome.

 As soon as Dave got home from work the first day I had it, I wanted to get some “events” going so I could get the friggin thing off my neck. We decided the best course of action was to go to our favorite local bar. They have an elevator there, that I use every time we go out for wings, and that usually messes me up pretty good. Well, I think my body knew a test was going on as I rode it like 6 times, with a friend who works there, and NOTHING. Son of a bitch. 

 All in good time, a week later, I ended up having my five “events”. Always when I didn’t expect it, and most of my issues were dizziness and shortness of breathe. I can get short of breathe just sitting on the couch. I brought my monitor back with a piece of paper that I recorded my symptoms and times of the events and they told me that my results would be in by the end of the week and they would call me if necessary. 

 Well, I did end up getting a call. I seriously figured even though I had the episodes that I recorded, that nothing was going to show. I got a phone call from his assistant that I needed to be on a beta blocker, as they diagnosed me with supraventricular tachycardia. This means that my heart beats too many beats per minute, even without any exertion. It is a type of arrhythmia.  I was prescribed Toprol to try to get this regulated more, and recommended that I took it before bed as it would cause drowsiness.

 Drowsiness my ass. Even upping myself to two klonopins at night, I was wiiiiiddddeee awake.  So of course I was even more exhausted than the usual during the day. And once again, that feeling that I haven’t missed, nausea. Every morning (or afternoon since I spent the morning in bed) when I started taking this drug, as soon as I drove anywhere, I would get awful motion sickness and throw up. I drove to the bank to make a deposit for work at the window and as they opened the window, I had to quickly open the door and puke. Luckily I didn’t get it in the deposit box. 

 I also puked in Dr. S.’s parking lot when I went there for my bi-weekly adjustment. I feel bad for the guy, I usually have super dirty hair, suffer from plumber butt half the time, and now, I probably smelled like puke. I am pretty sure it was all of the above that time. I can imagine him drenching his hands with bleach and scrubbing with a metal scouring pad once I leave every time I see him. 

 Dr. S. asked me what I thought was making me sick, and I told him about starting the Toprol and he told me to stop taking it, see how it goes, and to call the cardiologist if it improved. I stopped taking it and the nausea went away. Like I have said, he is almost always right.


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