Monday was the first day of my second week of this protocol. It seems like sometimes it is easier to be on the antibiotics, but today didn’t seem that way. It was a slow start to the day, I couldn’t even get out of bed. My knees, hips, and wrists were throbbing. My muscles were sore and I just wanted to lay there in bed and try to find a comfortable position and go back to sleep. But, I force myself to get up and moving. I get decently put together since it was a dressing change day.
After my boatload of antibiotics, I felt completely out of it. I had a lightheaded feeling, hot and cold flashes (I knew those hot flashes would eventually come back for a visit), my knees and fingertips were killing me. Really? The tips of my fingers? Lyme, Bartonella, Babesia, whatever you are, stop being so damn creative, would you? Stick with the general fibro and exhaustion. Stop being a dick.
I accomplished nothing at work. I entered and printed checks and set them to the side of my desk. I was in outer space. I almost forgot about my dressing change at 1:00. Pulling out of the driveway I scared the living shit out of myself. I looked left and completely forgot to look right. I lucked out but I cut off a giant dump truck. That was super smart of me. I am not like that at all. I have been super careful in my driving ability (mind you the slight Lyme Rage), and have always stopped when I needed a break, even though I drive a very, very short radius from my house.
Laying down in the comfy hospital bed made me regroup a little bit, and since I didn’t finish anything at work, I stopped at the store for a coffee, and away I went, back to work. And I did a little better that time around. I would have just stayed home, but in the chances I would feel worse on the next day, an “off antibiotic” day, I wanted to get things all done so work wouldn’t just keep piling up on my desk.
I made a quick dinner, and spent the rest of the evening on the couch. I did my IV azithromycin on the couch, and Dave laid next to me most of the time when I got them done. I think I scared him last week. I scared myself. He could tell that I felt terrible by the glossiness of my eyes, and turning a paler shade of pale. I was miserable. And the nausea started to kick in a little bit. The first time on an “on” day since seeing Dr J.
This IV just plain takes forever, so it was nice to have some company, even if we didn’t have anything to say to each other.
Off topic: I feel like I jumped around a little in my story, as I talked about my weekend on Tuesday, but today is Wednesday and I am talking about Monday and Tuesday. If that makes any sense. It does to me, but like I said I am loopy as shit, so maybe I am the only one. LOL Maybe I will catch up with my story so it coincides a little better with what day it is. Ugh.
Tuesday came, and I was looking forward to massage day. I kept in my head as much positive vibes as possible, as I know I will need to keep them to get through this week. Rainbows, butterflies, and unicorns. Yeah, that feeling kind of wore off as soon as I left to go to work. I started feeling very dizzy and lightheaded. My legs, knees, and hips were in searing pain. My wrists hurt. By the time I had got to work, and all I could think about it how I wanted to be back in bed. Tuesdays aren’t really a busy day for me at work, so I was happy about that. I still had stuff to do so I still held on to what was left of those positive feelings for the day.
My massage therapist always points out what the main issues are for the week. This week it was kind of an “all-of-the-above”. Before I get on the table and ready, we usually chit chat a bit about how the week went and how I am doing symptom wise. She always looks at my feet, which are problematic and always blue, and I could see her press down on my big left toe to see how long it would take to get some color back. It was awhile. Then I realized that I didn’t feel her press on my toe. Hmm. I could feel the bottom of my feet, but not the tops.
She decided to go with a full body, and focus on my lymph glands in my neck to get them draining. Runny nose. She said that everything was out of whack. Probably why I am having so much pain this past week. I am usually psyched because I can walk lot better when she is all done, but that didn’t happen this time. The same pain, and by the time I made it to my car in the parking lot, my ankles hated me too. Ugh.
I have usually been cooking just for me to have another thing to do to have some independence. I was hoping Dave would make something for dinner instead as I didn’t feel well, and because he is a much better cook than I am, but I of course forgot to pull something out of the freezer. Oh darn. Poor me. Guess it’s a take-out night! I called Dave real quick and had him pick up a salad for me and a sub for him.
As soon as I finished my salad, I went to bed. This past month or so has been the only time I have been taking naps, so this is definitely new to me. Exaustion to a whole new level. No matter how tired I use to get, I somehow managed to push through and not sleep. My body says no this time. I slept for about 4 hours, and woke up feeling unrested, and kind of mad at myself since I took a nap so late, so it would be all that much harder to go to bed later on.
I was wrong though, it wasn’t. I did a lactated ringer, quick and not having to pee afterwards, and sat and watched a crappy Lifetime movie. I think I might have seen it a couple days ago, but I can’t even remember LOL. I guess it was new to me last night hahaha. Then off to bed I went.
Today I am doing my morning clindamycin IV as I am typing this. Followed by a scoop of peanut butter for my Mepron. Then my Septra DS and Artimisinin. And my supplements. Tonight the same antibiotics and my disliked Azithromycin IV.
Tomorrow and Friday I am not looking forward to. Add Flagyl. If you have read my past entries, we really aren’t the best of friends. But just two more days and I have a week’s break. Maybe Flagyl won’t be so bad since it is only two days. Looking forward to that break! Silver linings. I don’t even care if I feel worse, I just need to not be doing all of this, before I go out of my mind.