Thankful Every Day

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Okay.. I really didn’t want to do a cliché post about what made me thankful on Thanksgiving… but I am going to. My blog. Love me or hate me… na na na na boo boo. You know you love me.  :):)

I had been writing things down that I was thankful for everyday on the countdown to Thanksgiving. Well, that is sort of a lie since I forgot a bunch of days, but I realized that those who have all the reasons to hate this world, tend to be the most thankful and grateful for everything that life has to offer.

Upon my reflection in writing, I was grateful for a ton of things but a few really stood out for me.

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Although life can be really sad, depressing, and the reality of the situation of losing control of my mind and body can be overwhelming, I have remained so positive because I know things WILL get better. I am thankful that I can look past that. A lot of people can’t keep those feelings of positivity, which whatever situation they are in, and I can. I am strong.

A good read about positivity is my blog post, “The Man in a Wheelchair”. This man amazed me and I will never forget him. https://kimmiecakeskickslyme.wordpress.com/2013/08/22/the-man-in-a-wheelchair/

I am thankful for all the help that I have gotten from my parents. As you have read, my Dad is also my boss. Yikes! Just kidding. We have our disagreeances and things can be extremely frustrating at times, but he has been flexible and accommodating to what I am capable of. I don’t think I would be able to work if I didn’t have the flexibility of a bookkeeping position and the understanding. I am thankful that I can even do what I do for work, as I am convinced I would go completely insane at home, regardless if I would want to spend most of my days sleeping.

My Mom has been there to listen and vent , and has taken it upon herself to learn and research about my laundry list of conditions, and give her support.

They have also lifted the financial burdens because without that, it would be an even more stressful struggle trying to get well. In all reality, I don’t know where the heck I would be right now, since there is no way Dave and I could do this all on our own.

I am thankful for everyone that cares about me. This one has been difficult, hard life lesson as I have lost a few of those people due to their judgement, and misunderstanding. It upset me, but I then realized those people don’t matter. People show their true colors. Who wants someone in your life that doesn’t really care about you.  Cross you out of their lives because you are sick, think you are lazy, judge you, don’t try to understand, and come and go out of your life.. I surely don’t.

My best friend S, has been there for me since day one. Making sure I am okay, letting me vent, doing things to help like get me out of the house for a bit, even small kind gestures like helping me wash my hair. She is a genuinely good person and I am blessed to have her in my life.

I am thankful for my other best friend, A., whom I can chat with for hours, and just sit. We never run out of things to say. She “gets” me.

Both of my best friends, as well as a handful of good friends have always treated me like I was “normal”, and have been beyond accommodating in their plans to be able to include me. They are wonderful.

Although this occurred last year, I am still very thankful that my town came together to hold a benefit for me. It makes me remember that I DO still matter, even when I have days that I feel like I have turned useless and a waste of space. It is a terrible feeling, but the kindness of others shows me that it is another very big thing to be grateful for.

New friends and other friends  have come out of the woodwork to show they love and support me. Everyone worked so hard to set up the event, many businesses donated items, and a lot of people showed up to show they care. Even complete strangers.

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I had to add that I am very thankful for my goofball animals that love me unconditionally and put a smile on my face. I am also thankful that they don’t pester me like they do to Dave. 🙂 🙂

I am thankful that things are not worse for me. Now, I will say, I absolutely fucking hate (!!!!) when people say the phrase to me, “it could always be worse”. No shit. Things could ALWAYS be worse. But in all fairness, they are right…things COULD be worse.

Many don’t have to financial means or support that I do. I have a home to call my own. Many have lost theirs to do everything they can to try to regain their health. Or lost their jobs. Many are much sicker, whether in complete debilitation, or emotionally they cannot see past the bad and fixate on it. Some do not make it through this battle that is Lyme and Co’s.

Although I have likely had Lyme for over 20 years, I was lucky to not have to go through years of extreme suffering, misdiagnosis after misdiagnosis and have to visit dozens of Doctors before finding their answer, and many have been treated with all the wrong things, which has made them much sicker and more debilitated.

I am thankful it only took 4 doctors from my crash in my early 20’s until 25 to find my answer.

I am thankful that I am lucky enough to see one of the world’s leading Lyme specialists. I am thankful that I have a wonderful and knowledgable naturopath that has also been a big part in my healing. He found the answer I was looking for. Lyme disease. Both go above and beyond and genuinely care about their patients well-being.

I am thankful for my hospital’s reception and day surgery staff. As many Lymies know, the hospital is the last place you want to go for ANYTHING. Many do not believe in Chronic Lyme, follow the CDC protocol, or have no idea about the disease.

The staff I that I had seen every week for over 15 months, and still continuously see, do not doubt my diagnosis or treatment. They care for me and want to know about my process. I am known by name, which is kind of sad, but on the schedule is little hearts around my name. A doctor, yes, a non-Lyme literate MD signed off on my dressing changes and bloodwork at the hospital as I have met him before when I was very sick nearly two years ago, and he really wanted to help. My experience with the ER is a different story though 😛 LOL

I am thankful for my progress so far. it has been a long ride but I have made leaps and bounds of progress compared to where I use to be. Although everything seems to be slowly spiraling back downhill, I am still an entirely different person. I can function much better on most days, running errands, and doing more things. The most important thing is to look at what I CAN so, versus what is still a struggle for me. Although it makes me really sad that I am not where I would like to be, I am thankful to even made the progress that I have. Baby steps and I will get there.

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I am most thankful for Dave. My rock. He has put up with me BEFORE I got sick, let’s face it, I can be a pain in the ass, and has stuck around to help in any way he can. He drives for me, takes me to the doctors, helps make dinner, clean, go grocery shopping, has pushed my wheelchair when it is needed for long trips, is my seizure patrol, has given me baths, and is always making sure I am okay and don’t get hurt. I am thankful for his sense of humor, his mentality that it is his duty to be here as we are husband and wife, and never resents me. He didn’t head for the hills. He is facing this with me. He is my everything. ❤

I hope you all, if you are sick or if you are reading and are in good health, can reach down inside of you and figure out what is most important to you. Everyone has something or someone who puts a smile on their face.  Every day you need to think of these things to remind you of all the good in this world. It is something we should be doing every single day. I know I do. 🙂

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

5 thoughts on “Thankful Every Day

  1. Pingback: A Thanksgiving Poem for You | J. Keller Ford - Author

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