Monday was another dizzy and lightheaded morning. My body isn’t cooperating at all since I stopped taking my antibiotics. You’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t! I got through it and got to work, and I was able to focus and work with my Mom a bit trying to get my new Quickbooks program up and running. It felt good to help her out. I felt like I was actually being useful, which I haven’t felt like in awhile.
I was wiped out from the productive work day, but was able to still make my world-famous turkey chile. Okay, it really isn’t world famous, but it is pretty darn good. I add all sorts of veggies and tons of beans. I also add ghost pepper sauce, so it is sure to clean your sinuses in the wintertime! 🙂 That is probably the one dish I won’t let my husband cook, because I KNOW it isn’t going to come out as good as mine does. This seldomly happens but chile is one of those things I feel is a science. 😉
The rest of the night was all about relaxation, and I did, until I tried to get up off the couch at night, and my legs decided to be pretty useless. I fell down like a sack of potatoes. I teared up, more so because I was mad that I fell, and not it hurting, and knew it was definitely time to just go to bed. As I always say, tomorrow is another day…
Tuesday was my massage day. My circulation was better in my feet than it had been for quite some tome, but my thighs had no circulation, and hurt like hell. The connective tissue in the back of my neck was excruciating. Gayle had to do a lot of lymph drainage as my lymph nodes in my neck were beyond swollen from the toxins in my body. Sure enough, I had a stuffy nose, so I knew that it was working.
I waited all afternoon for my juicing package that I was planning on starting the following day, only to find out I was an idiot and ordered it for NEXT week. Ugh. I truly am a moron sometimes. Lyme brain. LOL If you could only see me looking at the clock, sighing in frustration, and yelling at Dave telling him I was going to call because I paid a buttload of money for a day’s worth of juice, it should be there on time… he rolled his eyes on me for that one!
I got a letter in the mail from my insurance company, saying that I DO NOT have insurance. What? You bastards took out multiple payments and I have conformations and a policy number! I called, and was literally on hold for close to two hours. Of course I just put it on speaker next to me on the couch, so I could listen to their music while I was watching TV, but it was the fact I was on hold for that long that annoyed me. They must be swamped with angry people calling.
Well, it ended up being a hilarious phone call. The woman’s name was Kim, she asked for mine, and I told her Kim Martin, and she nearly squealed in excitement on the phone saying in a few months she will be a Kim Martin too since she was getting married in four months. I told her I would try not to be a complete bitch then. And I wasn’t. I got all the answers I needed, and my medical card has been shipped. My payments still haven’t come out, and apparently it was only three times instead of four. Phew. I have progress. And I can now get a temporary one online. Praise baby Jesus! I was more than happy about this. When the money gets taken out, then I will deal with that hurdle when it comes. After that, even though she was more than pleasant, I just had enough.
At night, I was absolutely freezing. Nothing I could do could make me feel warm. My hands were turning blue. I took a bath and washed my hair before bed, with it being massage day and all, and the water felt like it was a million degrees, and caused me to have that sharp pins and needles feeling you oftn get if you hop in the shower when it is really cold outside. I ended up getting to bed earlier than my 2-4 bedtime, since all I wanted to do was curl up with my two favorite boys, Dave and Chance, get some warmth, and finally go to sleep.
Wednesday was the doozy-est of them all. Dooziest? Doozy-est? Not sure if that is a word, but I am going to use it anyway. Pretty sure it is not since I am getting the red squiggles under it, but no other suggestions… Anyways…
I actually woke up not to far past my alarm, but found myself taking forever to get ready. Partially because I couldn’t stand for very long without feeling like I could pass out, other I just couldn’t find the right thing to wear. I’m not like that, especially considering how much I hate taking a bath and washing my hair… So picked out a cute outfit and omitted the bath. LOL It was probably better off, since my knees and thighs hurt so bad. For a nice change of pace, my numbed feet were back, instead of having sharp stabbing pain. I don’t quite know which is worse. Numb or pain. At least with pain you can still feel them. It can be hard to walk on feet you cannot feel…
I was pretty busy at work. I had some daily tasks to do, and then worked on doing some year end things and began to get really frustrated. Yup home. But I couldn’t go home. I still had lots to do!
I had to swing by Dr S’s as I needed another big bottle of magnesium glycinate, since I forgot the last time I was in, then the bank, as my paycheck had been sitting on my front dash since Friday, and then the pharmacy. By then, I was holding onto dear life on the countertop. I was feeling like a human furnace and was beginning to feel really light headed. I unbuttoned my jacket in hopes that it would help. Oh god oh god oh god.. not again! I made it through though.
I forgot I needed to get everything ready for DC when I got home. I also forgot to print out notes for Dr J, so I know I will be scrambling to get it all done. I will have to pack. And I am freaking put about cleaning. I can’t have a dirty house! I was just so tired when I got home.
Dave had other plans, so I took his lead. He had to drop off an engine stand (or something truck related) to our friends house that he had borrowed, so we went to go out and get a quick dinner at a new restaurant and then go drop off what he borrowed.
Now you would all be so proud of me, knowing what type of rage I usually carry. Raw chicken. Pink in the middle. Put on top of my mashed poatoes and veggie so I couldn’t just eat the other stuff. I don’t like returning food. I have seen the movie “Waiting”. LOL But I felt the anger billowing up in me. Then, Dave took a bite of his burger. It still was raw in the middle, like it hadn’t even been cooked at all! Dave is one of those people who likes things very well. Hockey puck burgers are his favorite.
I was as nice as I could be to the waitress, but Dave could tell we just needed to go before things got worse. We weren’t going to wait until new food was cooked, and once again.. we have seen the movie “Waiting”. We were one of two tables in there! Whyyyyy?! The chef/owner actually came out and personally apologized, then proceeded to tell Dave that sometimes it is hard to tell if a burger is done. LOL WHAT? And you own a fucking restaurant with burgers as their main food item? No wonder they just opened and have terrible reviews on Yelp.. At least their service was nice. I would get a bottled beer if I ever had to go back there at some point. We did tip the waitress though. It wasn’t her fault and she was really nice too.
We left from there to go to our friend’s house. Dave was kind of mad at me because he thought it would be okay to microwave everything to try to “kill the bad stuff” … oy Dave. No. Just no. Plus 35$ for a raw burger, a raw piece of chicken, and a coffee with the option for salmonella and e-coli didn’t seem worth giving them money. Since it was icy in the driveway, I decided to hang tight and sit in his truck, play with my phone, and listen to music. Now this is the part where it gets fuzzy……..
I vaguely remember texting Dave asking if he could help me get out of the truck to go inside to go to the bathroom. When he came over with our friend, as I was told, I was was bawling my eyes out and gasping for air, or what appeared to be, was completely incoherent to anything going on, and then started convulsing when I was in the truck. Once it had stopped, after a few minutes, I was groggy, but he carried me to the bathroom, since my legs just weren’t working and I was no weak. Hmm. It seemed that I had already emptied my bladder some.. talk about insult to injury.
I definitely felt the aftermath of my episode. I was beyond tired. My right eye and side of my head were pounding. I asked Dave if he thought I had a panic attack that I just couldn’t remember, and he told me he didn’t think it worked that way, and you don’t piss your pants, nor do you convulse.. shake yes, but he said not convulse. He told me my hands were somewhat clenched but were mummy like. I don’t know. I really don’t. I am just so frustrated because I haven’t had a seizure or anything of the sorts since July.
Tonight I am headed to Boston. Friday is my DC appointment. I am so unsure of what is really yet to come, especially after this week, but I am coming to terms with it. This is a process, and a journey. And quite the journey it has been. Wish me luck.