November Part 6 – Stuck


I have been recouping from my seizure and I guess I will call it “seizure activity” following my previous seizure, since I don’t really know for sure what happened, other than my brain blew a fuse.. or something like that.

Every day since, by around 5:00 in the evening I can barely keep my eyes open, and I end up falling asleep until around 8:00, when Dave waked me up so I have a possible chance at falling asleep again before midnight.

I figured it has been best to really focus on detox this week, and did another juice cleanse. I have taken diflucan, loaded up on burbur drops, and been keeping up with fluids. Lots of water with a coconut water every once in awhile as drinking a lot of water tends to get boring after awhile.

My blood work results came back the other day, and I am still sorting through everything. My regular blood work was all over the place. The test showed I had high RBC, HGB, HCT, Protein Total, and Albumin levels. I am wondering about my glucose level, as it was low at 64 (the normal range is 70-99), considering I ate a sandwich three hours prior, as well as crackers before I went to the hospital. Not Lyme friendly I know, but with treatment I like to have a full stomach so I can avoid nausea. I question how my tests can be very high fasting, yet very low after I eat. Hmm…

My other tests showed my testosterone levels were pretty low. Everything else was normal, including thyroid. I had a brief email with Dr S about my testing, and he believes I am stuck in the follicular phase  with my hormones, and stuck in a point of growing tissue and inflammation, and will continue to get worse if I have cysts. I do, small ones at this point. He still feels that it is a good idea to do the exploratory seizure, believing I have adhesions or endometriosis that isn’t being detected on an ultrasound. I think another appointment is needed to further discuss my blood work, but I at least have the papers in my hands to give to my new gynecologist when I see her in early December.

On another note, I do NOT have Myasthenia Gravis, so my neurological symptoms are clearly getting more severe as time is going on. I guess that is one thing to check off my list, as this all seems to be a process of elimination.

So right now I kind of feel like I am stuck. I don’t really know what to make of this all, and I still feel like I am in a place with no exact or definitive answers. This process is mentally exhausting. I am frustrated, and am beginning to feel like I am just plain crazy. I have a strong feeling in the pit of my stomach however, that I am not crazy, we just aren’t quite there yet. There isn’t really much I can do, but continue to be my own advocate and try to get everything figured out. I’ll keep pushing to get my answers.

This week has been unproductive, and I have been taking it easy. As I already said, I have been napping, and the house is getting dustier and dirtier. I just don’t have the energy to do anything. I have been pretty much dubbing at work, and leaving earlier than I usually do. I have prescriptions sitting at the pharmacy that I haven’t had the “oomph” to go and pick up. It is just one of those weeks. I am saving all my energy and being positive I will be doing better, as my best friend is having a jewelry party tomorrow, and I want to have a good time. I am a bit afraid as I have been ticking and stuttery, and although I am not a stranger to these issues, they are worse than they have been in a long time, and not having it be an every minute thing, I am not use to it and I feel like I might get embarrassed letting out an “Ahh” or doing the triller dance in a room full of mostly strangers. Oh well.

This morning was a Lyme rage morning. I am glad that the built up feeling has subsided, as it could have been a very long and bad day. A woman parked like a jack ass, blocking me in, while someone got out of the car to go into the gas station. I was waiting for her passenger to get back in so they could drive away, and her passenger decided to sit there talking to her standing outside leaning into the driver’s side window. “Effing dumb c-bomb! Really? Get the eff out of the way!”…. Only I didn’t bleep out any of those words. They looked at me like I had two heads, and didn’t move it along, so I backed out trying hard not to hit her car, and sped off like an angry teenager, blasting my music and flipping her off. I guess it probably didn’t have as much as a strong punch driving away giving her the finger, since Taylor Swift’s “Shake It Off” was the song blasting from my car. LOL. Maybe that was a subliminal message to me to well… shake it off.

My last concern is a TMI. I have been pooping blood. Burgundy poo. Ew. This started a few days ago, and although it seems to have gotten better, well I think, it has changed to very dark brown, yes, TMI. I know I have not had a normal “movement” for as long as I can remember, and pretty much need to be in a 10 second radios of a toilet at all times, so this is a little worrysome, but honestly I am hoping everything will fully resolve on it’s own, because deep down I don’t want to feel like I am crazy anymore with my unanswered questions. At least for the moment, since I feel like I have suffered a bit of an emotional blow still being the point where I am at still.

I hope you all have a great Friday and weekend. Wishing you all a pain free, less foggy weekend. I am surely wishing the same! xo.

5 thoughts on “November Part 6 – Stuck

  1. Hi Kim, So sorry you are having such a awful time with treatment. Hope your Drs. can get some things figured out for you soon. Hope things improve for you.

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